Pain and Gain

Pain and Gain

Rated R and Released in Grand Rapids 4/26/13

Reviewed 4/29/13 at Celebration North Theatre in Grand Rapids, MI

with Gary

2 1/2 out of 5 Js in QUIET Rating System

Gary and I thought it helped to see the Dateline segment days before we saw the Hollywood version on the big screen. The backstory really filled in where needed and made it a bit more exciting. Although the events are so hard to believe, it might be reason enough to see this flick. During the movie a few times they put lines like, "really based on true events" or "yes this really happened". Have you ever seen Jay Leno's headlines that he comically reads, "stupid criminals..."? This is a whole movie about super stupidity on steroids. Pun definitely intended.

Mark Wahlberg plays juiced up, pumped up, personal trainer Daniel Lugo at the Sun Gym in 1990s Miami. I think Lugo has taken one too many pills (or he's as small-minded as he is big bodied) because he comes up with a ludicrous scheme to kidnap and steal all of Victor Kershaw's (Tony Shalhoub) assets, one of his top wealthy clients. If you are thick-headed and going to enlist the help of a couple others, you should make sure they are smarter than you. But as you could guess, Lugo doesn't. His friend Adrian (Anthony Mackie) and new acquaintance Paul (Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson) jump on the crazy train. All of the antics they do to execute their endeavor are beyond belief and it gets pretty comical. They pull this off for awhile after torturing the tough old bird Victor, to take away everything, and take over everything. The more you watch it, you can't believe how long they keep it up. The group of course blows through the stolen assets and they are now on the next scheme. More scenes of stupidity roll on and their next victims don't fair as well. This leads to their eventual capture and arrests. Veteran director Michael Bay directed this for a reported miniscule 25 million. While I don't think you really need much more to get this strange story out, the movie does have a low budget feel. Pain and Gain is way too long at 130 minutes. But if you enjoy watching very humorous cluelessness or just want to be entertained by Wahlberg, Mackie and Johnson, they do a pretty good job portraying the dumb trio. I am hoping none of them do anything like this again. Move on.

QUIET Rating system: 2 1/2 Js

Quality: JJ

Understood story:  JJJ

Interest: JJJJ

Entertainment:  JJ

Time:  Jj